Journal

“Sex toys are only for masturbation.”  I’m not sure where people get off saying something like that.  But it’s certainly not the first time it’s been said, especially by frum Jews.  The problem is, this is a complete misconception.  But the question the assumption is based on is still a good one: how can a sex toy, which tends to be used for masturbation, actually bring a couple closer together? A little anecdote to elucidate the issue.  When I was starting Better2gether, I met with a frum business consultant to mull over the idea.  When I sat down with him,...

My name is Rabbi Natan Alexander, I sell sex toys, and I want to talk to you about modesty. We at Better2gether deal with this issue day in and day out. You may be asking yourself, ‘How could an adult toy website deal in modesty?'  Let me explain. To get to the root of the issue, one must first define modesty.  Jewish tradition teaches that there are two different situations that require modesty in relation to one’s body.  The first situation is when one is doing something perceived as lowly, such as going to the bathroom.  It is here that...

Pain is both a physical and emotional experience. Women who experience pain in the most intimate  location, the vulva and vagina,  lack outward signs related to chronic pain or disability. They often experience  visits to multiple practitioners before receiving an adequate diagnosis and this can contribute to psychological distress. During sexual activity, pain or discomfort can coincide with arousal, touch, penetration and orgasm. This experience can subsequently affect the desire to engage in sexual activity, the ability to become or remain aroused, and the capacity to consciously relax the pelvic floor sufficiently to allow comfortable penetration..  Vulvodynia, which causes discomfort ...

It is doubtless a cliche -- no progress can occur in human relationships, and most especially in sexual matters, if there is no communication. But cliches gain their dubious status because somewhere within them is a kernel of usable truth. It cannot be said often enough: Communication is the very lifeblood of relationships. People generally make love in the dark, which is not only literally true but might also act as a metaphor for the situation as a whole. If a couple continues to do the same things every time they enter into sexual intercourse, without once asking a partner...

Why can’t I buy a sex toy without seeing naked people on the package?  Or more correctly, individuals using said product?  Is this the only way to sell these items?  Could you imagine what sales would be like if feminine hygiene boxes depicted their usage?  It’s an absurd notion but it gets right to the point: Is it necessary for the packaging to be this way?   In this day and age, most people share more with total strangers on social media than they share with their own spouse.  Many choose to seek sexual pleasure by watching pornography and viewing...